Mandy’s gone, but not Minx’s triggers.
Today, on the menu:
- Dishwasher soap. As soon as I dipped my hands in the soap water, they took a life of their own and pulled my shirt off. Then, they grabbed MORE soap and started rubbing it all over my chest. I’m sure that would’ve been sexier if it’d happened to Mandy (she does the dishes, normally, and I do the drying). Guess that one’s a fail for Minx…
- Banana. I ate one. Or tried to, anyway. I’m SURE I don’t need to describe what *I* felt the moment I put the banana in my mouth. Problem is, something took over me and I couldn’t stop thrusting and pulling the banana back and forth. At least until I came in my pants.
- Phone moan. The phone rang (damn those telemarketing people!). With every ring, I moaned out loud. Couldn’t stop myself. Every time, every ring, until I picked up. The only other problem: with every ring/moan, I got MUCH harder… Third ring, I was standing at full attention. More than that? Ouch! (You can imagine how CLOSE I stayed to the phone…)
It’s not all that funny anymore, or even a little sexy.
Wish I could grab the little pest!
–Jaycee
4 thoughts on “Triggers! (VI)”
Gallstone
Y’know, I’ve been thinking… What if Minx isn’t even i your apartment anymore? What if she just left after you insulted her, and you are now unprotected from the Unknown Faerie?
As for catching the little creepling, whoever it is… Would you object very strongly to investing in a lot of mosquito nets and super glue? I’m sure I don’t need to draw you a picture.
Lurker
That’s it, Gallstone nailed it.
All the “triggers” that you described do not sound like the work of a scorned faerie, and your comment describing how Attitude shrunk your member when she got offended just cements it. In short: this has not the markings of faerie revenge (which would be direct and swift).
Here’s my take on the turn of events: Attitude has to leave. Given that faeries are extremely territorial, she leaves Minx to pet-sit you, knowing that intruding on a turf of another faerie is tantamount to a declaration of war. The fact that Minx is only borderline competent (by faerie standards) is irrelevant. In fact, Attitude does not even tell her what her job is, lest she try anything stupid. Minx probably thinks she was left in charge because she’s trustworthy or something.
Enter a big blundering oaf named Jaycee who (through stupidity rather than malice) insults Minx. Minx cannot directly retaliate as she was given specific instructions not to damage the merchandise (or face Attitude’s wrath) but, not knowing she’s not supposed to leave, she goes somewhere to skulk.
Now said oaf is unprotected and suffers the mischief of any passing faerie, possibly more than one. I won’t be surprised if there’s a faerie “contest” where each trigger is set by a different one, to claim the house and it’s inhabitants. And it’s going to get worse.
I suspect that your only choice of action is to convince Minx to come back, and to do that, you’ll have to give her the opportunity to grow, fairy style. Agree to anything. Boobs, permanent erection, handshake orgasms — whatever it takes, it will be better than the alternative.
Or, you know, you can let things unfold.
Jakob
Where is Minx anyway? Didn’t you say she had her own mini toy house?
Lurker
Even if she’s not there, it’s a good place to leave a note.