I just woke up this morning, feeling beside myself.
Which turns out to be exactly the problem. When I looked next to me, expecting to find a sleeping Mandy, I found… me! Sleeping.
“What the heck?!?” Continue reading “Freaky Friday? Traumatic Thursday!”
Awright, who’s the wise guy?
A bunch of DVDs I’ve never ordered just arrived at my place today. There’s, like, two dozens of them. And they’re all somewhat softcore stuff (and even some hardcore), like: Continue reading “DVDs! DVDs EVERYWHERE!”
To celebrate my newfound flaccidness (is that a word? I’m declaring this a word now!), Mandy and I decided to go to the beach yesterday.
You can imagine things didn’t quite work as planned.
We got there late in the morning, still early enough that the place wasn’t too crowded, but not so much so that we had a lot of private space. But hey, it’s a beach, and the whole point of going was NOT to have privacy. I’ve had enough privacy in the last months, so I was grateful for the crowd. Continue reading “Sunny Side Up”
I don’t know what it was with Mandy, but ever since we slept together on Thursday night, I appear to be back to my normal self. No more constant erection! I can have a normal life again!
Huzzah!
–Jaycee
As I just woke up next to a naked Mandy, I’m trying to figure out how I didn’t see this coming.
Maybe there was faerie magic at work, but I don’t think so. It didn’t feel forced or animalistic. It felt right.
But then again, when you’ve had a hard-on for months, I guess any… release… feels right. Continue reading “Guess I’m Still Clueless”
In my last post, I mentioned Attitude’s new friend. Some of you would probably think she’s found some new human to torture, but no, that’s not it at all. I mean a real friend, in the faerie sense of the term (whatever that means). It’s another BLOOMIN’ faerie!
From the beginning, now…
Attitude has been pretty absent from my life in the last few weeks (months?). Sure, there’s the occasional appearance, round of mockery, and minor curse, but by and large, she’s been unusually absent. She then shows up, on Tuesday, with this new little faerie trailing behind her. She’s not at all like Attitude, though. Where Attitude is brash, obnoxious and aggressive, that one is more timid and quiet. Naturally, no one would tell me her name, but since I insisted on calling her something, they said I should use “Minx.”
All week, Attitude has been parading in the apartment, telling Minx about all my sexual misadventures, and showing her all the good hiding spots. From what I could observe, it didn’t look like Minx did a lot of magic. She flew around, staying close to the walls, and was quick to dart away any time I tried to engage in conversation. She looked more scared of me than I was of her.
Last night, Mandy came over. We were supposed to watch Game of Thrones (excellent series!), which I’d downloaded for the occasion. Because of my erectile situation, Mandy and I have worked out a routine: I stay on one end of the couch, a pillow in my lap; she stays at the other end, on the right, and we put the popcorn in the middle. And so it was last night, just as usual. Except that about half-an-hour through the episode, I hear some tiny giggling coming from my left. From behind the lamp, both faeries are chuckling as they look past me, toward Mandy. I turn to check out what’s so funny, and understand immediately what’s going on. There was Mandy, just watching the show, not really noticing that her nipples had become EXTREMELY pointy. One hand had casually reached up to scratch the left one. Her breathing seemed a bit heavier than normal. Noticing something was wrong, she turned to look at me and saw where my gaze had settled. Looking down, she gasped and withdrew her hand quickly.
“Damn! What’s going on with THOSE?” she said.
There was more tiny giggling on my left, but I don’t think she heard it. Now that she seemed aware of what was up, it seemed like her nipples softened up and she was back to normal in moments. I tried to make some kind of joke to lighten up the mood. I didn’t want her to realize the faeries might be messing with her. She might decide to avoid coming to my place, and then I’d really be mostly by myself.
“Ha! Looks like you’re REALLY enjoying Game of Thrones!”
She laughed.
“Well, considering how YOU’VE been… afflicted, you like it a LOT MORE than I do,”
We joked a bit more and I tried to hide my growing concern that the faeries might be messing with Mandy. I hope that’s not true, the girl’s gone through enough already.
–Jaycee
Did I mention that my phone has gone from iPhone to full-featured erotic toy? Just recently, it’d become this loud and graphic device, which was bad enough, but now, whoever messed with it turned the vibration function to the max. The result? A bit embarassing…
Let me start at the beginning… Continue reading “It Vibrates, Too!”
I’ve tried to be as much of a recluse as I could, considering the swelling issue I’ve been having, but it couldn’t last.
By the way, to those of you who emailed me, asking me why I was complaining, ask yourselves this: have you ever tried living a normal life with a blatantly obvious erection? I’m not talking about that little boner that hits you when you least expect it, and you just have to stay sitting for 10 minutes to wait it out. No, I’m talking about a monstrous beast that looks like you’ve stuffed a full salami between your thighs and that pushes up to get past your belt and tickle your belly button. Continue reading “A Disproportionate Problem”
I’m sorry I haven’t been updating you about the state of my life and my friends of late. I’ve been a bit of a recluse, so aside from Brooke coming over to play Call of Duty with me, or Mandy coming over to bring me food (she’s a darling, that one!), I’ve just ignored people for the last bit. Continue reading “Oh, Swell!”
Okay, that flirting thing is getting out of control.
This morning, around 10:00, Mandy, Brooke, and “his” girlfriend Roseanne all got together for brunch. Mandy was there first, and I was really happy to see her. She looked really good, wearing a short and slinky black dress and a white jacket. I couldn’t help myself and immediately started hitting on her, complimenting her on how sexy that outfit was. (“Admit it, you’re wearing it just to seduce me, aren’t you?”) She blushed a little bit (how cute!) and started giving me a hard time about how much of a pig I am, but I hit her right back with a couple of well-placed comments on how she’d be disappointed if I DIDN’T at least notice her looks. (I think the bit about her new French manicure really scored me some points.) I said I’d normally ask for her number, but since I already had it, there was no point. And then she said I was right, there was no point, since I wasn’t using it much these days… Continue reading “Brunch with the Girls”
I’ve been pretty silent the few weeks because there just hasn’t been all that much to talk about. The new job is panning out nicely, and the folks I work with (when I’m in the office, twice a week) are very easygoing and laid back. We’re doing children’s books, after all. (And before you go off calling me names because of the Albert thread in the past few weeks, rest assured that my work there is irreproachably pure and chaste.) And my colleagues are fairly conservative (they’re also on average a good ten years older than I am). It’s nice to be working in a totally non-sexual atmosphere…
Here’s what’s going on with the various people in my life: Continue reading “A Little Update”
After a much-needed vacation, I’m back in the saddle. I have to give a big hug to Mandy for taking care of this place while I was gone. I’m sure it wasn’t easy… So thanks Mandy.
And for the doubters who think ill of her, let me go on record and say that things are good between us, now. I haven’t talked about our relationship here since she’s been “back,” but the Sex-Predator Mandy is gone, and this one is the friend I had lost during all these years. With all the chaos around my relationship with Lana, and the damage Morgan has made, I just didn’t mention anything here about Mandy and I. But we’re good. Continue reading “I’m Back!”
