I’m going to step out of character for a moment.
Cosplayer Yaya Han has a few words for men and women (READ HERE). I read her public message this morning and felt I had to react to her message. Considering the kind of comic I publish (and, in particular, the latest strip, #250), I couldn’t help but make a stand. In panel 3, our favorite princess gets groped while working (and wearing a very sexy outfit). I have great respect for my audience and I’m confident it’s made of smart and respectful males (and, perhaps, a few female who got lost on the internet and ended up here). I’m confident all but a tiny minority would never go around groping a woman in the street who’s just minding her business. But to that minority, I say “please stop it.” This woman is someone’s sister, or mother, or daughter. She’s not your sexual fantasy.
I’ll admit I’m often torn about this strip, wondering if I’m helping perpetuate gender discrimination and abuse. The strip often makes light of situations which, in real life, would be obscene, immoral, and vile. At the end of the day, though, I come back to the same conclusions:
It’s a fantasy. It is perfectly okay to fantasize. There are NO wrong fantasies. Your mind is the safest place in the world and you should feel free, in there, to experiment with ANYTHING that turns you on. Anything. NO LIMITS. I may not share your fantasies, but you have a right to them, just as I do mine. Having fantasies and exploring them IN THE PRIVACY OF YOUR MIND is considered healthy by most mental health specialists. You’re just expected to keep them in your head and avoid socially deviant behavior (or be ready for the consequences).
You’re responsible for your actions. I couldn’t put it more simply. You decide to enact a fantasy with an unwilling participant? Not only are you doing something immoral, you risk getting caught and prosecuted to the full extent of the law. Your personal health is also at risk. You may also get severely beat up by nearby males who realize this kind of behavior is inexcusable and decide to unleash some of their more violent fantasies on you. (Turnabout is fair play, right? Well no, it isn’t… But you get the point.) We are humans, not animals. Our real strength lies in our discipline, our ability to control our animal impulses. Let’s behave accordingly.
And with this, I leave you with a sexy picture of Yaya Han to fantasize about:
We now return you to your regularly scheduled fantasies. (Speaking of which, I think I now have one for Martine that involves a latex catsuit, an upcoming comic convention, and some uncontrollable public arousal…)
–Jaycee
“I’m doing it.”
13 thoughts on “Respecting Women”
Jonathan Tanner
Good for you man, and good on Yaya for raising awarness!
Guesticus
Always preferred Cat in her purple outfit (with or without the tail), or even the original with the dress and hat (sorta like Carmen San Diego, but hotter 😀 )
Jayessell
I thought that was Bia Ling from ‘Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow’.
Pry
Moral advice from Yaya: it’s a lot like accepting hubcaps from a manatee. They may be fine hubcaps, but how is it qualified to offer them?
Jaycee
Not sure I follow your reasoning. You seem to be implying that she is not qualified to offer moral advice. Am I misreading your comment?
–Jaycee
“I’m doing it.”
Chup@Cabra
Over in another forum I am a part of, we had a discussion about more or less the same topic due to an article I found elsewhere:
http://tinyurl.com/q7j2hyz
I’ve got to admit that I’m something of a double mind on this topic.
First, to be clear, I don’t consider it all right AT ALL for a man (or anyone) to put their hands on another person without their permission, PERIOD, no matter how the woman may be dressed.
However… cosplay is a special circumstance. As above, a cosplayer shouldn’t be touched without their permission (male or female). Cosplayer’s do dress as they do to draw attention to themselves, though, and yes, some of that attention could be rude and crude.
If a convention attendee is acting in such a manner to a cosplayer, they can be reported to security. However, in my opinion cosplayers should have a somewhat thicker skin than a ‘mudane’ person because they may well get harsh and unkind comments based on their look (from the quality of their costume to the sexiness of the cosplayer her/himself). And, to be fair, if you dress like a fanboy’s Wet Dream (and look the part, like YaYa) you should steel yourself for at least some uncomfortable stares 🙂
Hell, I’m one of those people who’s so cripplingly shy I can’t work up the nerve to ask people to take their picture, even when its obvious they don’t mind due to all the other people taking pictures of them at the time ^_^
Jaycee
I’m pretty sure Yaya isn’t complaining about the stares, though, but about the groping (and, sometimes, the catcalling) she’s subjected to. Even inappropriate comments are, well, inappropriate. As far as I’ve been able to determine, cosplayers first and foremost cosplay to express their love for a character. The attention they seek (and which they thrive on) is appreciation for their craftsmanship (yes, even Yaya). They’re not looking for sexual attention.
At least that’s my understanding of it. I’d love to hear from some cosplayers on this.
–Jaycee
“I’m doing it.”
Pry
It is what, jokingly, I was implying. What with her moral compass being a somewhat questionable thing.
Jaycee
I don’t have any particular reason to believe her morals are questionable. Do you?
–Jaycee
“I’m doing it.”
Pry
It’s all come over a bit more seriously than I intended, but the short answer is that it was my way of drawing attention, in an instance where she was being regarded as a moral authority, to her general demeanor and conduct. Of course, morality is a broad thing, and I neither have reason to nor would I imply that she would, for instance, kick a baby into traffic or fail to offer aid to an injured person, but based on many years of observation from running in the same circles I’m fairly confident in my assessment of her as someone from whom such advice is, if not hypocritical, something which should be received with a raised eyebrow.
Jaycee
Actually, the more I think about it, the less it matters who the source is. Technically, your statement is a bit of an ad hominem fallacy, where you put in question her morality when it’s not the actualy topic. Is her message correct? Is her request fair?
I’m not actually a fan of Yaya Han from the neck up (let’s talk plainly, here). I get a slight feeling of “fakeness” from her that’s a turn off for me. But when it comes to respecting her personal space, that doesn’t matter.
I think I get your point—you’re not saying she deserved what happened, you were just highlighting the irony of making such complaints when she might be someone of poor character. I suspect we’ll both agree that in the end, those are two different topics that should have nothing to do with one another.
–Jaycee
“I’m doing it.”
Pry
Oh, absolutely! That’s why I said they were good hubcaps. 🙂
Pry
That said, I should make it clear that such observations are purely my own opinion, and I may well, and would be quite happy to, be mistaken.