I’ve tried to be as much of a recluse as I could, considering the swelling issue I’ve been having, but it couldn’t last.
By the way, to those of you who emailed me, asking me why I was complaining, ask yourselves this: have you ever tried living a normal life with a blatantly obvious erection? I’m not talking about that little boner that hits you when you least expect it, and you just have to stay sitting for 10 minutes to wait it out. No, I’m talking about a monstrous beast that looks like you’ve stuffed a full salami between your thighs and that pushes up to get past your belt and tickle your belly button.
I don’t think a SINGLE woman has looked me in the eyes in the last few days.
There was ONE funny moment in all this, though. Mandy was here on Sunday. She brought me a bag of groceries, and just walked in my place (she has the key, of course), intent on cooking me dinner. Then she saw me, and stopped.
“Wow, you are one HAPPY fellow,” she told my penis. “Attitude?” she asked, her eyes not leaving my crotch.
“Yeah,” I answered.
She looked away and inside her grocery bag. “O-kay… Not appropriate, I think. Let’s just order pizza instead.”
I was puzzled. “What’s in the bag?”
She showed me. Hot dogs.
Yeah. Pizza it was.
–Jaycee
11 thoughts on “A Disproportionate Problem”
Nixemus
Wow. Lets hope you don’t bump into Brooke in the near future…
Jessica
I’m not laughing at you I’m laughing with you. Ok as a girl I must admit we don’t quite have that issue although there is always having one’s headlights come on. But padded bra’s take care of that.
Well, I guess it’s time to take matters into your own hands. Lots of luck. Love the comic!
Jaycee
When you said “to take matters into your own hands,” you weren’t actually suggesting what I think you were suggesting, right?
— Jaycee
Jaycee
Speaking of headlights coming on, I have an odd, probably perv-sounding question (which, considering the strip I publish, shouldn’t surprise anyone). 🙂
When your nipples become erect, do they also become MORE sensitive, or is that just pretty much the same? Do you feel different? Do you automatically know they’re erect without looking, or do you only find out by following the stares of surrounding males who’ve suddenly stopped looking at you in the eyes (for those who ACTUALLY did in the first place)?
(And before you turn the question around to ask the MALE version — yes, we can’t escape noticing any “status change” to our hardware.)
–Jaycee
Velvet
Well, I usually feel them hardening, and they become more sensitive too. Anticlimactic awnser?
Jaycee
No, not anticlimatic, but let me try to scratch a little deeper, just for fun. If/when there’s absolutely no one watching when it happens, what impulses (if any) first come to mind? And I mean anything, from a single innocent gesture to a half-hour of sweaty, screaming self-satisfaction…
–Jaycee
Miss_3
I have to say it’s different for every female. I don’t always notice my headlights being on unless I’m really cold, and mostly I’m not very sensitive there. :/
Mouse
I’ve noticed differences with my own friends and the reactions to becoming turned on.
For myself, I tend to start noticing every little thing that brushes by them, and I’ll try to find some alone time.
A couple of my friends will just suddenly start touching them without realizing they are.
Then there is the ones who just don’t notice it at all.
Temp
Long time reader, just popped in to see if the blog had come back up and indeed it has 🙂 Good to see, and also good to see is the fact that you have not yet tried to do anything with either brooke and mandy. Hope it stays that way, though it would make an interesting read if it doesnt.
Also liking the new investigative ‘I am blog’ idea, lets see wjat it turns up when 🙂
–Temp
ging3r
oh oh im glad i read this blog ^_^
well jc like they said some ladies dont feel it others do then either do something in screaming factor or not..
now what id say is that for us who have one or both our ”head lights” pierced might tell you its slightly uncomfortable when cold or its a turn on no matter what or sadly no effect. but most times its a turn on hehe;)
keep up the great work hehe
Jaycee
Hey, I want to thank all the women who’ve come on record to talk openly about their “headlights” and how they feel about them. I realize it’s probably a pretty weird topic to discuss with non-females, but I’m sure there’s a number of guys out there who’ve been wondering.
Funny anecdote from my side: I once had a lapdance from this girl who was super-sensitive. So much so that after 10 minutes of me playing with them, she actually shoved a nipple into my mouth, and then proceeded to (ahem) rub herself until she reached an orgasm. (And then there were the others who just yawned in boredom…) So yeah, wild differences. Which, as some of you may recall, kind of illustrates the story of Lana vs Kathy at the end of last year…
–Jaycee